BY Donna Brown Bowles
© February 28, 2022. Published from WordPress

I AM, So Glad That I Never Let You Go

He was so young but so much older than the rest,
making people laugh where ever he would nest.

There were times when friends would hug him
for a day and they would whisper, “Levi, I love you, don’t you ever go away.”

Defeat was his challenge, to conquer peace within.
There were times he would ask a question,
“God, when will this ever end?”

And sometimes he’d catch smile , from the eyes of them that see.
This always made him happy to complete his endless destiny.

New friends, replaced his brothers and sisters as well.

But he always missed his family of, a time so long ago;  a painful memory trapped in time, where only he could go.

The years robbed his smile as he remembered, how it used to be.

As he walked his last mile in the bitter cold.
He was hoping someone would find him and never let him go.

His eyes filled up with clouds and he could not see the road.

Suddenly, he realized that he had taken a wrong turn.  A trap was set by the enemy.

No one was there to witness what happened on that night.

I guess we’ll never know.

No one to hear him speak his last words of regret.

No one was there to catch him when he fell upon the snow.

No one was there to hold him when he breathed his last breath.

No one to say goodbye
as, he closed his eyes,
for the last time.

And fell…

No more longing for a family nor, a place to call his home.

A place where families are forever, never more to roam.

However, I think there is something, you all would like to know.

Just before he hit the ground; God opened up His arms and caught him, before he fell upon the snow..

He said, “Joshua my precious child, I just want to let you know, that my Son, Jesus, died for you, to wash you white as snow;
now, my son, let us return to heaven, where you left so long ago and, as far as your family, ‘it won’t be long at all’  and Joshua,
I AM so glad that,
I never let you go…”

Levi’s lovely girlfriend Mycah


In 2015 I went to visit my daughter’s in Portland Oregon.
My grandson had a beautiful labradoodle service animal.
His name was Kellen.
He was extremely intelligent, kind and so sweet. I fell in love with him quickly.
He was beyond precious.

I was there for about a month and Kellen and I became best friends, emotionally connected for sure.

The day I was leaving, Kellen and I were alone for my daughter had to run some errands.
I sat next to Kellen in a quiet room by the window.
I told him that I had to leave now but that I loved him and that I would never forget him.
I hugged him for a while  then I tried to look into his eyes like I usually did but, Kellen wouldn’t look at me, he just kept staring out the window.
He knew that I was leaving before I told him.
He knew that I would never  return.
He just kept looking out the window while I whispered, “I’m sorry, I love you Kellen.
I finished my goodbyes as I hugged him for the last time.
My ride knocked at the door and I quickly took  this last photo of him and cried…
My heart was broken as,  was his.
I’ve always wondered what he was thinking that on that day I went away.
Every time I look at this precious moment in time.
My heart hurts and I wish I would have stayed.

A few weeks ago I got a call from my daughter saying that Kellen was very ill and it’s due to old age.
The veterinarian said that he doesn’t have long to live and I have no words…

Just heartache and tears …

I’m sorry Kellen and I will always love you….

May GOD be with you till we meet again…




By Donna Brown Bowles published from WordPress. June 27, 2022 ©

When will my heart stop beating so this ache will go away?

When will the pain leave me to live another day?

When will my heart find peace in the absence of my son?

When will this despair leave my heart alone?

When will my tears stop bleeding in crimson tones?

When will the hole in my heart be filled with hope again?

When will I stop regretting all the years that you were gone, the times we missed,  the miles you walked alone, the tears that fell in isolation, when you were so far away from home?

When will I stop thinking of the thousand miles of storms that you wandered in the cold?

When will I stop hearing your last words, “Help me mom, I need you; I’m about to fall?”

When will I stop thinking that something went very wrong?

When will I forget that cold night that you stopped singing your last song?

When will I stop seeing your shadow on every wall?

When will I stop hearing your
Whisper…  “I love you mom, be strong, we’ll be together soon; it won’t be long at all.”

My dearest son, Levi, had reluctantly left this earth on January 29, 2022.
His last echo is infinite but
“it won’t be long at all.”

By Donna Brown Bowles
(C) June 27, 2022




It once gave you the wings to fly, then it took away your sky.

A need to survive.

The sky mirrors as a witness of your trials alone, on nights so dark they must not be shown.

All the tears you cried in silence.

All the pain you ever felt.

And all the isolation you had endured, even the times you wept, afraid and, alone.

My only wish was that your pain be mine.

I’m sorry I can’t turn back the time.

You were frozen by fear that you’d succeed but afraid you would crumble if you failed.

The heaviness you could not bear and the weight of it all broke you.

My heart hurts to remember but I cannot forget.

Falling and not knowing who would catch you, not knowing when HE warned.

Your fight was fought by you alone but little did you know God had already calmed your storm.

There were times you stumbled out of control.

And times that you really wanted to know.

Your spirit kept seeking light from the storm.

Obsidian Skies became a clue

That it might be a time to turn anew.

Its time for you to realize

God has given YOU back your sky.
Posted from WordPress
[by Donna Brown Bowles (C) 2014] revised 11/182019

I love you my beautiful daughter forever and always ❤

Unconditionally 💜


Levi, I’m so  sorry that  you couldn’t be here on your birthday.

I’m so sorry that I couldn’t tell you how precious your spirit was from the time that you were born.

I’m so sorry that I let you down.

I’m sorry that I didn’t ask you to come home.

I’m so sorry that I didn’t pray on the night you went away.

I’m so sorry that I couldn’t be there to hold you when you were all alone…

I’m sorry that you had to leave this world alone…

I’m sorry for not telling you how much I loved you and how important you were to me.

I’m so sorry that you couldn’t be here on your birthday so I could hug you through all those sad times..

I am so sorry that I cannot see your smile one last time…

R. I. P. my son…
I’ll see you soon…

Love always and forever,  no matter what ,


By Donna Brown Bowles ©
July 16, 2018

You have been gone so long.

We wished You’re weren’t so far away.

We pray for you every night.

Joey prayed for you to come home today.

Well, I thought you might want to know that Joey graduated from kindergarten today.

His smile how it lit up the room.

He so reminded me of you.

All the other mom’s were there.

His teacher said sometimes he’s happy, but most the time he misses you.

Oh how we wish that you were there.

All the kids sang a song.

To thank the mom’s that came along.

But Joey didn’t participate.

He just sat alone.

And wrote you a little poem.

The teacher said he could read his now.

But Joey said he’s saving it for a special day.

When his mom comes home…

With every day that’s gone by,
another memory slips away.

All the springs, summers, and falls and, lonesome winters without you here.

My how time slips away…

Joey said to send his love.

His eyes filled up with tears as he looked at your picture on the wall.

I guess that’s how life becomes
When moms are sad the pain takes away all they had

And son’s dream their dreams at night.
And tears fall all winter.

And summer comes

And time just slips away…

[By Donna Brown Bowles

(C) July 16 2018]

Finding Truth with Zen Garcia

I would like to introduce you to new way of finding truth with Zen Garcia, author and publisher of several books (20+) of ancient theologies with esoteric topics such as:
The Gnostics ; apocryphal scriptures; Lost Books Of The Bible; The Forgotten Books Of Eden; The Dead Sea Scrolls and more…

With skillfull articulation, Zen demonstrates how we have been manipulated from the beginning by comparing lost books of bible with the KJV bible to confirm their validity with elaboration.

Zen has spent many years meticulously researching various historical theologies. His findings of truth are astounding and as a direct result, has encountered opposition and ridicule not, only from the secular side but, the religious side as well.

Truth can be threatening to those who stand to gain without it.
In opposition, it would be unbearable to those who are unwilling to accept that they have been beguiled.

With fine articulation, Zen demonstrates how we have been manipulated from the beginning and the enemies agenda and explains how to endeavor freedom one compelling page at a time.

But, let me warn you first.
This information is for Truth seekers only.
If you are unwilling to embrace truth this is not the place for you.

I’ll share my story from the beginning when I first discovered the truth with Zen Garcia to explain why it’s neccessary to be ready to receive the truth.

My story,

It was almost two years ago that I had stumbled upon Zen; I believe it was by divine intervention. I was desperately searching for truth for many years when one morning I felt compelled to search, once more.
I turned on YouTube and discovered Zen.
He was discussing vaccinations with Laurel Austin, who has done in-depth studies on vaccines, and is a wellness writer and co-host for Zen Garcia.
I was stunned as I listened to their experiences, and their expertise as they examined these controversial issues with such tenacity.

I was convinced and inspired. Over the next few days I had watched as many of Zen’s YouTube videos as possible.
Including several topics and books that Zen had written:
“A Different Way of Being, Lucifer – Father of Cain, Awaken to the NWO, Sons of God: Who We Are Why We Are Here, Skyfalll- Angels of Destiny., The Aramaic Targum, and, The Flat Earth as Key to Decrypt the Book of Enoch.”

As I pondered all that I had learned, I became overwhelmed
I sat alone in silence and cried. I was angry and I came to the conclusion that everything I had ever learned was a lie, I discovered that the religious institutions as, well as our educational systems, were nothing more than a great deception. Their goal was to dumb us down and indoctrinate us in order to divide and conquer.
I wanted to scream to illustrate my burden but, there weren’t any words to describe how I felt.

I felt as though I had lived my entire life in a dreamland and then awakened to live the final nightmare!
I discovered the plans of the elite and how they had controlled us, what their wicked plans were, and how easily manipulated I was.
The thought of it all left me broken but not defeated!

I knew I could no longer sleep nor dream their visions and with no other alternative but to face reality, I surrendered…

For the first time I opened my eyes and saw a new world unfamiliar yet meaningful, hopeless now hopeful; moreover ,
I found the truth with my Savior, the Son of YHWH, Yeshua the one and only true living God.💕

Morning came and I began my journey of a thousand miles down the rabbit hole with Zen Garcia and Yesuah as our guide.

It was then that I discovered; nightmares only happen when you close your eyes.

“With eyes wide open” only now was I able to see that nothing was and, nothing is, what it appears to be. And the God that I never understood; I was beginning to understand.

So I chose to embrace truth and…











Find Zen Garcia at https://www.fallenangelstv.com/https://www.fallenangelstv.com/

Books http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/zengarcia

Zen Garcia Endeavor Freedom on Youtube

Happy Mothers Day Mom | iblogstr8sicit’s Blog by Donna Bowles, Brown

Happy Mothers Day Mom I Miss You….

My mother,
How she made everything
Beautiful and new.

Her smile lit up every room.

Her kindness, and unfailing love, always took away my gloom.

I miss you mom with my heart and soul.

Your fragrance fills the air with all the stories that you told…

Never, in the entire world would there be a mother with your heart of gold.

It’s seems like only yesterday I would kneel by you at night and pray…

Our trips to the ocean shore, a lunch for two, and the taste of that salty breeze, as though it was only yesterday, just you and me…

Oh mother, how I miss you so…
I just wished that we could be together just once more…

The day will come when we will be in heaven with our Father forevermore; your smile I cannot wait to see…

Until that day, I’ll hold on tight to my dreams of past and when HE comes and unites us once again

But, for now, I do regret, another Mother’s Day must end…

May God be with you till we meet again…

Happy Mother’s Day my precious Mom…I ❤ you…




If you steal from me it’s okay. 

I’m only passing through. 

My heart never belonged to you anyway. 

This world was not my intention. 

My empathy for you I’ll mention.

Briefly,  but sincere. 

Poetry (C) Donna, Brown, Bowles 

Our Father Is Coming Be Ready

Matthew 24:4-14


And Jesus answered and said to them,
“See to it that no one misleads you.
For many will come in My name, saying,
‘I am the Christ,’ and will mislead many.
You will be hearing of wars and rumors of wars.
See that you are not frightened, for those things must take place,
but that is not yet the end.
For nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom,
and in various places there will be famines and earthquakes.
But all these things are merely the beginning of birth pangs.



At that time many will fall away and will betray one another
and hate one another.
Many false prophets will arise and will mislead many.
Because lawlessness is increased,
most people’s love will grow cold.

But the one who endures to the end, he will be saved.

This gospel of the kingdom shall be preached in the whole world
as a testimony to all the nations, and then the end will come.

So my brother’s and sister’s we must stay close to our Father in Heaven because greater is HE that is within me than he that is in the world.

Therefore Put On 🕇🕆🕇
The Whole Armour Of God.


Ephesians 6:10-24

[10] Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might.

[11] Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.

[12] For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

[13] Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

[14] Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness;

[15] And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace;

[16] Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.

[17] And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:

[18] Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;

[19] And for me, that utterance may be given unto me, that I may open my mouth boldly, to make known the mystery of the gospel,

[20] For which I am an ambassador in bonds: that therein I may speak boldly, as I ought to speak.

[21] But that ye also may know my affairs, and how I do, Tychicus, a beloved brother and faithful minister in the Lord, shall make known to you all things:

[22] Whom I have sent unto you for the same purpose, that ye might know our affairs, and that he might comfort your hearts.

[23] Peace be to the brethren, and love with faith, from God the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

[24] Grace be with all them that love our Lord Jesus Christ in sincerity. Amen.

When Everything You Feel is So Unreal

When Everything seems so Unreal and you can’t find your way home…

Remember that this world is only temporary and you’re only passing through…

Your home is where your heart lives and mine lives through HIM…