I AM SO GLAD THAT I NEVER LET YOU GO

BY Donna Brown Bowles
© February 28, 2022. Published from WordPress

I AM, So Glad That I Never Let You Go

He was so young but so much older than the rest,
making people laugh where ever he would nest.

There were times when friends would hug him
for a day and they would whisper, “Levi, I love you, don’t you ever go away.”

Defeat was his challenge, to conquer peace within.
There were times he would ask a question,
“God, when will this ever end?”

And sometimes he’d catch smile , from the eyes of them that see.
This always made him happy to complete his endless destiny.

New friends, replaced his brothers and sisters as well.

But he always missed his family of, a time so long ago;  a painful memory trapped in time, where only he could go.

The years robbed his smile as he remembered, how it used to be.

As he walked his last mile in the bitter cold.
He was hoping someone would find him and never let him go.

His eyes filled up with clouds and he could not see the road.

Suddenly, he realized that he had taken a wrong turn.  A trap was set by the enemy.

No one was there to witness what happened on that night.

I guess we’ll never know.

No one to hear him speak his last words of regret.

No one was there to catch him when he fell upon the snow.

No one was there to hold him when he breathed his last breath.

No one to say goodbye
as, he closed his eyes,
for the last time.

And fell…

No more longing for a family nor, a place to call his home.

A place where families are forever, never more to roam.

However, I think there is something, you all would like to know.

Just before he hit the ground; God opened up His arms and caught him, before he fell upon the snow..

He said, “Joshua my precious child, I just want to let you know, that my Son, Jesus, died for you, to wash you white as snow;
now, my son, let us return to heaven, where you left so long ago and, as far as your family, ‘it won’t be long at all’  and Joshua,
I AM so glad that,
I never let you go…”

JOSHUA LEVI ALASKA 1998
Levi’s lovely girlfriend Mycah

I AM SO SORRY

Levi, I’m so  sorry that  you couldn’t be here on your birthday.

I’m so sorry that I couldn’t tell you how precious your spirit was from the time that you were born.

I’m so sorry that I let you down.

I’m sorry that I didn’t ask you to come home.

I’m so sorry that I didn’t pray on the night you went away.

I’m so sorry that I couldn’t be there to hold you when you were all alone…

I’m sorry that you had to leave this world alone…

I’m sorry for not telling you how much I loved you and how important you were to me.

I’m so sorry that you couldn’t be here on your birthday so I could hug you through all those sad times..

I am so sorry that I cannot see your smile one last time…

R. I. P. my son…
I’ll see you soon…

Love always and forever,  no matter what ,
Regretfully,
Mom.

MY HOW TIME SLIPS AWAY

MY HOW TIME SLIPS AWAY
By Donna Brown Bowles ©
July 16, 2018

You have been gone so long.

We wished You’re weren’t so far away.

We pray for you every night.

Joey prayed for you to come home today.

Well, I thought you might want to know that Joey graduated from kindergarten today.

His smile how it lit up the room.

He so reminded me of you.

All the other mom’s were there.

His teacher said sometimes he’s happy, but most the time he misses you.

Oh how we wish that you were there.

All the kids sang a song.

To thank the mom’s that came along.

But Joey didn’t participate.

He just sat alone.

And wrote you a little poem.

The teacher said he could read his now.

But Joey said he’s saving it for a special day.

When his mom comes home…

With every day that’s gone by,
another memory slips away.

All the springs, summers, and falls and, lonesome winters without you here.

My how time slips away…

Joey said to send his love.

His eyes filled up with tears as he looked at your picture on the wall.

I guess that’s how life becomes
When moms are sad the pain takes away all they had

And son’s dream their dreams at night.
And tears fall all winter.

And summer comes
Eventually.

And time just slips away…

[By Donna Brown Bowles

(C) July 16 2018]

YOU WERE ALWAYS WITH ME

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Even when I was gone

I knew you were there

You loved me in absolute silence

Waiting for me to surrender

Watching in rose colored glasses as I willfully sank into the stormy seas

The life raft seemed so far away

Blinded by what I could not see

Anticipation ~°•○●

One Nation under God chooses fear as opposed to morality… 

Tears fall on window panes…

Eyes absent of vision through a clouded window endures for but a moment in-between the storms and the rain..

Only a few can see and feel the heaviness in colors, black, blue, and melancholy… for you.

Some anticipate the sound of the trumpet…

Others refuse to believe…

Regardless, everything will soon change…

AWAKE; IT’S TIME…

~ Be Thankful Anyways ~

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Thanksgiving sets an unfamiliar tone.

A moment of melancholy.

A forced smile absent of reason.

Friends, Family, laughter, and  sincerity renders only uncertainties and loneliness.

A day when it used to be the way it should….

Be Thankful Anyways…

Thy will be done.

In Jesus Name Amen ~

~2015~

~Can’t find my way home~

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So here I rest in isolation from everything I’ve known

A wanderer in quest of a place
that I called home

Time spent in search of higher ground

Reality haunts my dwelling

Leaving more mountains that I must  climb

A thousand miles vanished

Renders only a consciousness

Of what I left behind…